Of course, dreaming about sex isn’t typically someone’s worst nightmare. But, if it’s recurring, intrusive, or you just don’t want to keep dreaming about someone you don’t actually want to sleep with, Loewenberg does offer some advice.

“The best way to make a dream stop is to take action on the message it’s giving you,” she says, adding, “A dream is going to nag you and keep giving you the same message again and again until you listen and take action.” So, if you keep dreaming about your boss, for example, “Then take the message and run with it,” she says. “Start being a boss in your own life. Start taking charge, and the dream will stop.”

To figure out the message, remember the main thing you want to do is “ask yourself, in what way do I need to connect with this person?” Loewenberg notes, as well as what it is you admire or respect about them. From there, you can start to embody whatever that quality or trait is.