Nude girls. Swinging in Upernavik

I am trying to be creative with this ad, but I just can't think of a catchy headline to save my life. Yea, I doubt I'd go very far in the advertising world! Headlines suck anyways. . .I have been living in Arlington for 2 years and haven't really put a lot of effort into the dating scene. I mean, I don't know what to expect on here. Am I supposed to take of my shirt and blow kisses into the camera Jersey/Guido style?? Screw it. . .I'll just list things:

About me:
-29, almost 30. . .oh shit!
-6'4
-White/Euro/Mediterranean mix mutt
-Dark hair and blue eyes
-Average/athletic build
-From Midwest (the land of hockey, Chevy, apple pie, Budweiser and Dave Coulier)
-Edumucated
-Goofy/funny/sarcastic. . .gotta live, laugh and love in life
-Can't dance very well
-I like glass-bottled Mexican Coca Cola. . .that stuff is badass
-Love me some microbrews, especially with the chilly fall weather coming up. . .yes I used the word
-Love good conversation, especially over a casual dinner someplace. . .pizza is still king though
-Not pretentious. . .love my hoodies and jeans and tees and Reebok Pumps!


You:
Ummm. . ..I am open to all responses from ladies.


*NO Nigerian bank Spammers
. Ready teen sex.

Lets start with a few lines in an email, shall we? . I am the woman you should get to know, because I have erotic moments when it comes to sex. I enjoy the most beautiful thing in the world and for that I need men who discover my femininity. It’s really fun to be like this and get that kick as an adventure. I am the woman who is serious when it comes to the fulfillment of male fantasies. I like it when you feel my desire.. I am interested in meeting other like minded people who share my passion for health and wellness.. Fem fishing rooms. I want to to have sex with a guy whose dick more than 21 centimeters.

Hobbies/interests